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Bar Yarns w/ just_a_girl, Kirsten Krauth (Merry Christmas Giveaway)

kristen kauth punkSome of you already know this demure debut author – sort of! Kirsten Krauth is not only a great new Aussie author to watch, she’s Editor of the NSW Writers Centre mag, Newswrite.

Kirsten and I met last September – author panel virgins at a NSW Writer Symposium.

A promotion powerhouse, mum, business owner – and more – Kirsten is a fun lady (as you can see by her profile pic – LOL) and a generous author, running a program on her blog for other debut fiction authors, so be sure to check out her blog addy.

But first, here’s a beer coaster, Kirsten. Would you mind jotting down the blurb for your book, just_a_girl, on the back?

just_a_girl tears into the fabric of contemporary culture. A Puberty Blues for the digital age, a Lolita with a webcam, it’s what happens when young girls are forced to grow up too fast. Or never get the chance to grow up at all.

Layla is only 14. She cruises online. She catches trains to meet strangers. Her mother, Margot, never suspects. Even when Layla brings a man into their home. Margot’s caught in her own web: an evangelical church and a charismatic pastor. Meanwhile, downtown, a man opens a suitcase and tenderly places his young lover inside.just a girl

just_a_girl is a novel about being isolated and searching for a sense of connection, faith, friendship and healing, and explores what it’s like to grow up negotiating the digital world of Facebook, webcams, internet porn, mobile phones and cyberbullying – a world where the line between public and private is increasingly being eroded.

Come on in. Grab a pew. What can I get you to go with your beer nuts? (Shandy? Wine Spritzer? Pink Lemonade?)

I’ll have a tequila slammer. Apparently tequila is the only drink you can have a lot of without getting depressed. Don’t forget the worm.

Hey, did you hear the one about …

Why did the man cross the road?

Because he couldn’t get his hat out of his underpants. Actually, that is my son’s favourite joke (at four). And my daughter has started saying it (at two). There are many variations including cats wearing underpants, pooey nappies, undies on head, bums with no underpants. But when my kids tell them, I find myself giggling hysterically. Some things never change.

I’m a beer nut nut! What bar snack would you be and why?

I’d head to San Sebastian and become a tapas in one of the bars in the old quarter. I’d be a skewer with anchovies, olives and peppers. Sharp, spicy, salty and slippery.

Ahh, that beer hit the spot. Let me slip a drink coaster under your glass while you tell us—on a scale of 1 to 10—as a writer are you a messy desker or tidy desker? (NB: 1 = “I am a neat nut case” and 10 = “What desk? Where? Is there a desk here somewhere?”)

That’s tricky. My ideal is about 2, where I can sit down with a clear, neatly ordered space and start. In practice, at the moment it’s about 8. On my desk I have a Carmen Miranda headband with plastic fruit (from my tap dancing concert a few months ago), three mugs with cold tea, a plate hidden up the back with some kind of banana on it, a phone that’s not plugged in and never used, three years of receipts for my BAS (I must get round to), a yoghurt pot from the Basque country and a black lipstick that I bought the other day when pretending to be a punk (see my profile pic).

The publican offers you free drinks all night if you will:

  1. Dance to Gangnam Style
  2. Sing John Denver’s ‘Take me Home Country Roads’ on the Karaoke machine
  3. Spend an hour washing dishes

Which do you choose?

Oh, there’s no choice. Gangnam Style. I’ve been dancing to it for years. Only if I can play the part of the horse, though. And someone else does the whipping bit. I have a weakness for dancing. Some people will wait for the right song to come on. But not me. I love disco. I have learnt tap, hiphop, salsa, African, jazz, belly dancing — but never ballet. Who can be bothered with it?

Time to liven the place up. Got a buck? We can crank up the old jukebox in the corner. You get to pick three songs.

  1. Stone Roses, Resurrection – to get the party into action
  2. Salt + Peppa, Push It – the best dance song in the history of the world when you’re very inebriated
  3. Nick Cave + The Bad Seeds, The Weeping Song – to regret your earlier actions (they lied about the tequila)

An author, an agent and a chicken walk into the bar… how do you know which one crossed the road?

Perhaps this links to my earlier joke. Look for the one with hands in their underpants. I don’t think many authors or agents can walk past a bar, even if it involves going on a long detour around the block – lushes, the lot of them. NEVER let an agent buy you a drink before signing anything.

NSW Symposium 09_13
And here is Kirsten ‘unpunked and pretty in blue’ at the NSW Author Symposium

There’s a stapler on the bar. Tell me what it’s doing there.

The publican uses it to murder all those who refuse to leave after last rounds, and insist on staying until ugly lights. Staple in the temple and locked up in an old warehouse ready for demolition. Sounds like The Wire, doesn’t it.

The pub is the heart of a small town and most locals would be lost without one. What are three things you’d be lost without?

  1. My kids waking me up at the crack of dawn every morning, while my husband snores beside me.
  2. A book, and a couch to read it on.
  3. Green spaces.

There are a few good prizes up for grabs in the bar jackpot. Do you have a lucky number?

7 (apparently nearly everyone chooses 7)

Last drinks, my friend! It’s been great. But before we go, tell us how we can find out more about you and your writing/books.

Come over and spend more time with me at Wild Colonial Girl or, if you’re in Castlemaine, always happy to smash a tequila down on the bar with you.

Find out more about just_a_girl: http://uwap.uwa.edu.au/books-and-authors/book/just_a_girl/

Buy my novel (paperback or ebook) at Amazon

Follow my blog at Wild Colonial Girl: http://www.wildcolonialgirl.com

Hang out with me at Goodreads

Visit me on Twitter (@wldcolonialgirl) or Facebook /wildcolonialgirl

GIVEAWAY TIME: It must be Christmas because Kirsten has pressies for two lucky readers: one printed and signed copy of just_a_girl and one e-book version.

Leave a comment below (and if you have a pref).  Comp closed. Congrats Elizabeth and Brenda.

If you enjoyed this Bar Yarn, there are lots more to come including more great giveaways. So you never miss a post, whack your email in the TELL ME! box (above/right).

Just wait until you see who’s dropping by for a Bar Yarn next. Prepare to giggle.

 

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Bar Yarns w/ Author – Nora James

Nora James

I asked Nora James to drop into Calingarry Crossing pub for a bitova yarn because I was both captivated and intrigued by her new release’s cover and title – Dark Oil. (Isn’t it a great cover? Look at those eyes.)

So, first up, Nora, here’s a beer coaster. Take a minute to jot down the blurb for your book.

 In DARK OIL  lawyer Lara Beckham is sent to Africa to save her company’s multi-million dollar investment and she’s devastated at leaving husband Tim behind. But what can she do? She’s needed on the other side of the world to fight corruption in a country of rolling sand dunes and roaming camels.

On her return, however, it becomes clear that Tim has had plenty of company while she was away. Now, on top of dealing with a complicated legal system, an African coup and a marriage beyond saving, Lara has one more ball to juggle: her effortlessly seductive co-worker, Jack Norton, is joining her on the job… and he oozes trouble.

Now, grab a pew. What can I get you to go with your beer nuts? (Shandy? Nora James coverWine Spritzer? Pink Lemonade?)

How about a Shandy-Wine Spritzer-Pink Lemonade cocktail?

I’m a beer nut nut! What bar snack would you be and why?

A plate of Spanish tapas because life should be colourful, extraordinary and full of flavour.

Ahh, that beer hit the spot. Let me slip a drink coaster under your glass while you tell us—on a scale of 1 to 10—as a writer are you a messy desker or tidy desker? (NB: 1 = “I am a neat nut case” and 10 = “What desk? Where? Is there a desk here somewhere?”)

Depending on the day I’d score a 1 or a 10. I tidy up on a regular basis and then, as I fall into the world of my story and my characters, my desk becomes a plane, a desert, a park in Paris in my mind, and so I take no notice of the accumulating mess. A few days later, perhaps because I finish a chapter or we are threatened with visitors, I come back to Earth and wonder what’s happened to my desk. I eventually find it somewhere under the research, the pile of books waiting to be read, notes to self, notes to others and more notes to self.

The publican offers you free drinks all night if you will:

     Dance to Gangnam Style

     Sing John Denver’s ‘Take me Home Country Roads’ on the Karaoke machine

     Spend an hour washing dishes

Which do you choose?

Dance Gangnam Style to Take me Home Country Roads. It kinda goes together, the horsey movements and the song about the country, doesn’t it? I definitely wouldn’t do the dishes – I do enough of those at home.

Time to liven the place up. Got a buck? We can crank up the old jukebox in the corner. You get to pick three songs.

  1. Sweet Thing by Keith Urban ‘cause I like to imagine he’s talking about me.
  2. Whisper Your Name by Harry Connick Jr. I just love that voice.
  3. The Cold Mountain soundtrack. There’s nothing like a bit of banjo in a country pub.

An author, an agent and a chicken walk into the bar… how do you know which one crossed the road?

Well, that’s easy. The chicken crossed the road first. The starving author spotted it and followed, hoping to catch lunch. The agent saw the author and thought “hey, that person’s going places. I’d better catch her before another agent does.”

There’s a stapler on the bar. Tell me what it’s doing there.

It’s waiting for another stapler to be placed next to it. Not any other stapler, mind you. It’s waiting for The One. Because even staplers need love.

The pub is the heart of a small town and most locals would be lost without one. What are three things you’d be lost without?

  1. My family (including my pets) for pretty obvious reasons.
  2. Food. You know how people sometimes say it’d be great to be able to take a pill and not worry about eating? For me that would be one of the worst forms of progress.
  3. Lip gloss or lip balm. I hate dry lips!

There are a few good prizes up for grabs in the bar jackpot. Do you have a lucky number?

Your lucky number is: the winning number. It goes something like this:

–        Monday night:

“And the winner is… number 309.”

“What? That’s incredible! That’s my lucky number. I don’t know how I didn’t get it tonight.”

–        Tuesday night:

“And the winner is… number 15.”

“What? That’s incredible! Fifteen’s my lucky number. I don’t know how I didn’t get it tonight.”

–        Wednesday night:

You get the picture.

Last drinks, my friend! It’s been great, but before we go, tell us how we can find out more about you and your writing/books.

You can find out more about me and Dark Oil at: www.norajames.com.au (Check out that fabulous review by top reviewer Jeannie Zelos while you’re there.)

Or find me on Escape Publishing’s website:

I’m also on Facebook

Thanks for dropping into Calingarry Crossing pub, Nora, and all the best with Dark Oil.

Beer Yarns and beer Nuts welcomes Kim KellyHope you enjoyed this Bar Yarn.

 

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Bar Yarn w/ author – Rebecca Raisin – Christmas at the Gingerbread Cafe giveaway

Love Christmas? Love Christmas at the Gingerbread Cafe, come on in, grab a pew and chat with the author, Rebecca Raisin who is giving away a copy (epub) of her beautiful, band new release to one lucky reader.

Rebecca RaisinNow, Rebecca, take this beer coaster and jot down a beer coaster blurb for your book – Christmas at the Gingerbread Café – out 12th December.

Christmas is the season the Gingerbread Café was made for…but owner Lily couldn’t be feeling less merry if she tried. She’s spent another year dreaming of being whisked away on a sleigh-ride for two, but she’s facing festive season alone – again. And, just to give her another reason to feel anything other than candy-cane perky, a new shop across the road has opened… Not only is it selling baked goods, but the owner, with his seriously charming smile, has every girl in town swooning.

But Lily isn’t about to let her business crumble — the Gingerbread Café is the heart of the community, and she’s going to fight for it! This could be the Christmas that maybe, just maybe, all her dreams – even the someone-to-decorate-the-Christmas-tree-with ones – really do come true! Rebecca Raisin novella

What can I get you to go with your beer nuts? (Shandy? Wine Spritzer? Pink Lemonade?)

I’ll go the wine option… I’m sure it’s lunch time somewhere.

Hey, did you hear the one about …

How many writer’s does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two! One to screw it almost all of the way in and one to give it a surprising twist at the end!

Guys..guys? That totally fell flat didn’t it? It’s not funny, is it? Can I have another glass of wine?

I’m a beer nut nut! What bar snack would you be and why?

Maybe I can redeem myself here…umm…I’d be a Jalapeno popper! Or, as our favourite restaurant calls them – fried mice! In case you don’t know, it’s a Jalapeno pepper, stuffed with cream cheese and bacon, then crumbed and deep fried. A little mouthful of oozy-cheesy goodness with a serious kick of spice.

Ahh, that beer hit the spot. Let me slip a drink coaster under your glass while you tell us—on a scale of 1 to 10—as a writer are you a messy desker or tidy desker? (NB: 1 = “I am a neat nut case” and 10 = “What desk? Where? Is there a desk here somewhere?”)

It’s abysmal. It’s so messy, I can’t write there. There’s no room. There’s even a computer there from the 90s. Or the Nauties. I don’t know, it’s a big clunky thing that I use to hang post it notes on. Well, I did when I wrote there. Now I write at the dining room table. Which is handy to the fridge, and the Nutella. And the wine. And the couch.

The publican offers you free drinks all night if you will:

  • Dance to Gangnam Style
  • Sing John Denver’s ‘Take me Home Country Roads’ on the Karaoke machine
  • Spend an hour washing dishes

Which do you choose?

This really depends on how much wine I have consumed. Let’s say I’ve had three glasses of wine. I’m totally singing, but worse, I’m also going to dance. Neither of which I can do at all. I’m banned from singing at home. My five year olds get all huffy and cover their ears and scream in capitals, “YOUR VOICE HURTS MY BRAIN.” They are so dramatic!

Time to liven the place up. Got a buck? We can crank up the old jukebox in the corner. You get to pick three songs.

  1. Stairway to Heaven Led Zepplin
  2. Hotel California The Eagles
  3. Jolene by Dolly

An author, an agent and a chicken walk into the bar… how do you know which one crossed the road?

The agent and the publisher crossed the road, only to get to the karaoke stage, where they promptly kicked me off, and took over. And let me tell you, I think someone is a little tone deaf too…

There’s a stapler on the bar. Tell me what it’s doing there.

I did not steal that stapler. I took it because I was planning on working from home. I don’t know why you keep asking me about it. You’re insinuating I’m some kind of kleptomaniac. *Hides boxes of A4 paper, and the small nail gun used to wallpaper my rejection letters*

The pub is the heart of a small town and most locals would be lost without one. What are three things you’d be lost without?

  1. Those pesky five year old twins. They’re cute, I guess, even though they don’t like my singing, my dancing, my cooking, my hugging predilection, the way I kiss them at school in front of their friends, my driving, and my robot impression.
  2. Books. If I don’t read at night, I can’t sleep.
  3. My computer. If I can’t write, I get all antsy, and a little unhinged. Googly-eyed, even.

There are a few good prizes up for grabs in the bar jackpot. Do you have a lucky number?

17

Last drinks, my friend! It’s been great. But before we go, tell us how we can find out more about you and your writing/books.

Thanks for having me! Do I have to leave? Is that why they’re flicking the lights on and off? But it’s so early…

(Bec, you can come back any time you like. I sure hope I get to meet you in Sydney at the RWA Conference. That real-life bar is starting to look good – and crowded.)

If READERS want to connect with Rebecca, here’s how. And don’t forget to leave a comment to win a copy of her Christmas novella –

And all next year you can follow Bec as she joins the Writing Novels in Australia blog program.

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/RebeccaRaisin/Author

Twitter: @jaxandwillsmum

Website: https://rebeccaraisin.wordpress.com

If you enjoyed this Bar Yarn, there are lots more to come. So you never miss a post, why not whack your email in the TELL ME! box above.

Beer Yarns and beer Nuts welcomes Kim Kelly